Remember in my first post, nearly a year ago, when I said I'd have a published novel by now? Yeah. That didn't happen. It turned out my, to put it crudely, turd needed a lot more polishing. Isn't that a horrible thing to say? In my defense, I was raised by a single father who was a truck driver. Crudity is almost bred in me! It's how I've thought of my novel all this year, especially around the fourth edit when I had to back away for six whole months. Perhaps I should back up, though.
Years ago, I wrote a romance novel. I thought I could write something funny and sassy and sexy. It turned out there was one publisher taking submissions full-on, Red Dress Ink. They were technically "chick lit," so I toned down my love scenes and sent it on. I still remember the woman who sent me the letter, Farrin Jacobs. She said no and that it was more of a romance novel (which I kind of knew), but she was so nice about it. She said she enjoyed my humor and my "voice"and asked permission to send it on to an editor she knew at HQN (a full length novel imprint of Harlequin at the time).
She (Abby Zeidel, who I took my pen name in honor of and because I just love the name Abby) said yes! Of course, that was just for her, not her boss, who said no. But she offered to send it on to another friend at Avon Romance and she also said no.
All of this took several months and, in that time, I wrote a whole other novel in a fit of excitement and exuberance and, after Kelly said no, Abby agreed to take a look at it. She thought it was too silly. (it kind of was) and that my heroine came off as too crazy (she really did). I still like that novel, but know that it needs extensive character and structure work (look for that should I ever finish polishing this one). But that last no, along with some family deaths, sort of stopped me from writing and I concentrated on family and other pursuits. Writing just took so much time and I'm not very good with rejection to start, so I ended up putting it away for a whole year.
But I missed it. I missed it so much, I found myself writing fan-fiction, which quickly became addictive. The reviews, the praise, the immediate gratification had me writing fan-fiction with every spare moment for the last six years. And no. I will not share my fic alias, but I will tell you that none of that fan-fiction will be showing up with changed names as a book. I know a lot of fic writers do it, some very well and some not so well, but I hate the idea of taking my fics down as I have a lot of readers who enjoy rereading the better (or even worse) ones or feel close to them. I'm not saying that won't change, but as of now, I'd rather explore other options.
But fic gave me something. It gave me confidence, a place to play and practice, and the ability to take valid criticism without giving up. Last spring, I finished a fic for a charity drive and felt quite proud of it. Then I stepped back and looked at all the fic I'd written by then and realized the word count was over 1.2 million. If I put some of that effort into writing something I actually could profit from, then maybe this could be a wonderful side job. I like my real job so much (which I don't feel comfortable sharing just yet). The pay fluctuates, but I am my own boss and have lots of free time. I also really enjoy writing. Can you imagine doing two things you enjoy and being your own boss? That's the dream!
Added to all that, a particular fic writing friend of mine had some success self-publishing and encouraged some of us to consider it as well. We started a group to support each other and I decided to take another look at my novel. It may have been ultimately rejected, but it got some promising responses. If I could take some of my fic time and put it into "polishing the turd" (I swear, I will find a more appetizing way to say it at some point), then maybe I could follow her into indie author bliss and make some spare change.
I'm now on my fifth draft and fourth title. It's been through a varied circle of readers and I'm just waiting on my final edit. More on that next time...
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